ok, i just checked my load order to double check which esm files were and were not working, i had a feeling i missed something and i was right.
turns out that i need to deactivate the following masters in order to get the menu to show up...
BrokenSteel.ESM
PointLookout.ESM
ThePitt.ESM
I cannot definitively say if Tale Of Two Wastelands.ESM is an issue or not since i cannot reactivate it without its masters active but the 3 i mentioned above are definantly causing the issue.
Anchorage, Zeta and Fallout3.ESM are all fine, the game loads the menu with them active.
Is there anyway to resolve the issue with the ESM files that arent working?
Also sorry for not realising it was 3 esm files causing the issue sooner, i must of skipped a few combinations while finding the cause.